As I'm taking stock of things, I'm looking at the gaps between where I am and where I want to be, and what I need to do to get there. In order to really do this exercise right, I have to be brutally honest with myself. This means owning my faults, my weaknesses (which, of course, I have -- I lay no claim to perfection), and maybe realizing where along the way I should have zigged when I really zagged. And, if I'm not careful, I know that I can wind up beating myself up, which can lead to me dragging myself in the gutter for a good wallow in my shortcomings. I think that's OK once in a while, to do it briefly, but I can get lost there sometimes, and it takes a *lot* of energy to pull myself back out.
But, not going there this time around.
All I have to do is realize how odds-defyingly lucky I am to have the life I have.
The way I look at it, I'm a lottery winner many times over.
I was born in a country with amazing opportunities and freedoms.
I was adopted by a loving family. Sure, like most people, there's times I wondered "how in the world did I wind up with this bunch?, but never once have I question my family's unconditional support and love.
I have a knack for science and logical thinking. I've done well as a computer science geek, electrical engineer and lawyer, and doing well in those fields has provided me with great opportunities.
I consider myself a pretty healthy guy. I know, sounds like the last thing someone who has had stage III colorectal cancer and now poops in a bag hanging off his stomach would say, but I believe this. The cancer thing was an aberration. Like being shot by a stray bullet. I've proved to myself that my body is still highly functional and capable, and as long as I take care of my body and my mind, I should be here a long time.
So, I view where I was born, the family I was adopted by, my technical skills, and my health are all lotteries that I won. There's plenty of people out there who would love to have the "problems" I have, such as they are.
I feel beyond fortunate and blessed to be in my position.
I just owe it to myself, my friends and family, to live the best life I can.